“Are you insane? Or are your pants too tight?!”

Whoever can tell me what movie the title/quote comes from gets a prize.

The other day I was getting ready for work when I received a text message from one of my sisters, it said:

“I sat down and [my pants] cut off the circulation to my upper body.”

I tried not to laugh, but then I realized she probably sent the message to make me laugh. Don’t you just hate it when- in the words of Chingy- you have to “jump up and down just to put ‘em on, wiggle it around just to put ‘em on, [and] lay back on the bed just to zip them up?”

I sure do.

I swear I’m not obsessed with diets and big butts. It’s just that my shorts are a smidgen tight around the waist and I got to thinking…

Are You Lonesome Tonight?

I love Elvis.

I'm listening to Elvis on my ipod right now.

I think I might name my first child Elvis- boy or girl. Elvis is a cute name for a girl, right?

Okay, maybe I wouldn't name a girl Elvis.

I first started listening to Elvis in high school- high school in Malaysia, not Provo High.

During art class, Mrs. Butler would let us listen to whatever we wanted when we were working on our projects. There were two students in the class so I got to choose the music a lot.

One day, we were listening to Elvis when Loh walked in. Loh and Mrs. Butler were good friends, he would often stop by to visit.

Loh was one of the security guards that worked at the front gate of the school letting people in and out. In fact, he was the head security guard. I found this picture of Loh online-it's amazing the stuff you can find using Google.

Loh was a big fan of Elvis too. He told me which movies to see and which Elvis movies not to bother with. Loh even made a mixed CD for us to listen to.

From then on, every time I saw Loh at school he would mention something new about Elvis. Or he would sing.

"Isn't it Satisfying to Take Care of Your Own Car?"

Tonight I washed and detailed my car-by myself- for the first time since 2007. My dad coached from the sidelines... he's a pro because he washes it for me all the time. He reminds me to check the oil and add air to the tires. The only thing I do is pay for it- even then he takes the money out of my account every month and makes the payment.

While I was scrubbing away, Dafoo would ask me,

"Isn't it satisfying to take care of your own car?"

I'll admit, it was somewhat satisfying to finally vacuum my car and get rid of the dust. You know what is even more satisfying than taking care of my car??

My Obama dashboard-bobble head that I got in Hawaii.

I love kitschy crap like this.

But I digress...

I have the greatest dad in the world. We rarely call him dad...it's almost always Dafoo. When we lived in Malaysia we took Mandarin lessons because so many of the Chinese in Penang spoke Mandarin; Dafoo is the Mandarin translation for David.

My dad is so good to us. He's never yelled at me or my sisters- I don't think he's ever really punished us either. He's threatened, but that's about it.

Happy Father's day to the greatest dad in the world!

I love you Dafoo!

Juicy Double

I have been on a diet for a few months. Yes, a DIET, not a "healthy life change" or whatever euphemism people like to use for the four-letter word. I think it is working, my Grandparents noticed when I last saw them. My Grandmother gave me a great piece of advice,

"Lose all the weight you want, just don't lose that big butt of yours. Big butts are really in style."

Who doesn't like being in style?

Jennifer Lopez and Beyonce know all about style.

I added a more recent photo because JLo's badonk-a-donk isn't as big as it used to be.

I can't remember what point I was getting at.

I've Got Gas...

Gas laws that is.

Do you remember...

PV=nRT?

Pressure x Volume= number moles (R constant 0.08206L/mol*K) (Temperature in Kelvin)

Neither did I.

(ok maybe I did, I just hate sounding like a know-it-all.)

Christina is making up some chemistry worksheets so the teacher will raise her grade from a C+ to a B (she needs B's or better to get a specific scholarship). Christina has had all year to complete her chemistry worksheets but here we are-4 days before the school year ends- working on the chemistry worksheets (I can't really blame her, I wait until the last minute too).

Imagine a 17-year old, drama queen using her high-pitched "helpless" voice:

"Malaina!!!!! Help me!!"

Often times "help me!" is Christina-speak for "Do my homework for me, I don't really care about learning this stuff." I didn't really care about learning this stuff when I was in high school or when I was a freshman taking Chem 105 at BYU.

I guess I'm glad I know it now, it helps with all the biology stuff.

First Blood

I saw First Blood today.

It was AWESOME.

I almost didn't make it to church because my eyes were glued to the TV. Rambo came on after, I set it to record and headed to church. One of my family members stopped the recording after 45 minutes.

Figures.

I'll have to get it on netflix or something.

I'm going to a live taping of Craig Ferguson when I get to L.A.